GOP v. DEMS

On two successive nights, January 30th and 31st, Republican and Democratic candidates debated on CNN, and the settings for the two events spoke volumes about the distinction between Republicans and Democrats.

On Wednesday night, the Republicans appeared together at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley, California. On Thursday, the Democrats debated at the Kodak Theatre in Hollywood—the site of the Academy Awards and American Idol.

The GOP, in other words, associated itself with one of the greatest presidents of the 20th Century, while the Democrats chose to link their party to the movie business.

Reagan was all about Morning in America and extolling the virtues of our Shining City on a Hill. The Oscars are all about dark, dysfunctional views of American reality, emphasizing sex, violence and self-agrandizement.

I guess that says it all.

The Last Time Bill & Hillary Slept Together

Showing great disrespect to the Great Communicator, Bill and Hillary Clinton slept together during his funeral service.

Cat Fight Witnessed By Few

Bill's Blunderful Blog Endorsements

Proposition S - No
Proposition 91 - No
Proposition 92 - No
Proposition 93 - No
Proposition 94 - No position
Proposition 95 - No position
Proposition 96 - No position
Proposition 97 - No position

Democratic Candidate for President - Barack Obama. He does not villify his political opponents and has the potential to unite the country.

Republican Candidate for President - Mitt Romney or Alan Keyes (No, he hasn't dropped out yet!). True Reagan conservatives.

Bald Karl

Now You Are ALL on My List!

Frightening his co-workers at lunch, a certain paralegal suddenly stood up and angrily announced he was returning to the office. His stunned co-workers sat in silence and confusion as they watched their fellow employee storm out a never-used side exit, muttering the phrase "Traitors!" when they did not follow him.

Only One Man Has it Right

Hillary Lets Slumlord Rezco Sleep in Lincoln Bedroom

During this week's Democratic Candidate Debate, Mrs. Bill Clinton viciously and histrionically attacked Sen. Obama because while working as a law clerk, he put some letters in a file for one of the firm's clients, a man named Rezco who was accused of being a slumlord. Turns out, Hillary is a good friend of this slumlord and I theorize that she probably even let him sleep in the Lincoln Bedroom. HERE IS THE PROOF.

The Lane Institute of Policy & Management

Now we know how Scott comes up with all his "ideas."

Guess Which One is the Republican?

The Key to Her Campaign

My sources have located this photograph taken from a hidden camera situated in Hillary Clinton's Campaign Headquarters. It was taken during a policy meeting.

Separated at Birth VI

Ghost Riding The Whip

The Way I See It

Who killed JFK? If you still think it was Lee Harvey Oswald and you believe the lone assassin theory or if you are stuck in a cave somewhere then consider these important historical facts : The assassination took place in Daley Plaza, site of the first Masonic temple in Dallas. Dallas is located just south of the 33rd degree of latitude. The 33rd degree is the highest degree one can achieve in Freemasonry. The New Orleans CIA (who provided security) station's headquarters were in a Masonic temple. And last but not least, Mason Lyndon Johnson appointed Mason Earl Warren to investigate Kennedy's death. 33rd degree Mason, Gerald Ford was instrumental in suppressing what little evidence of a conspiratorial nature reached the commission. Responsible for supplying information to the commission was 33rd degree Mason J. Edgar Hoover and former CIA director and Mason Allen Dulles was responsible for most of his Agency's information to the panel. There IS NO need to wonder whether there is a conspiracy going on, the fact is AMERICA IS ONE BIG LIVING CONSPIRACY.

My 2 Cents

Many people say that OJ Simpson was guilty. But according to the law, a person is guilty if proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. Maybe he did it, who knows. But according to the evidence there are too many pieces left open, which creates reasonable doubt, such as:
Ron Goldman was in the peak of his prime physically. OJ was old and had arthritis. Ron Goldman had alot of bruises and cuts. This indicated that there was a long struggle. If there was a long struggle, then OJ would have had bruises as well. OJ had NO bruises. None. Zilch. Also how could an old OJ hold off a young well built guy with ONE HAND (OJ would have had to be holding the knife in the other). In fact OJ had to hold of Ron Goldman AND his X-WIFE with one hand AND not get bruised, and some how miraculously not get any of the truckload of blood on himself so that no blood gets on/inside his Bronco AND get home and within 6minutes shower. FUNAMENTAL LAW: You are innocent until proven guilty. PROVEN GUILTY: Must be done without any doubt. If there is reasonable doubt in the case, then there cannot be a guilty verdict.

Mark Fhurman on his second time on the stand when asked the yes or no question "did you plant evidence?" stated "I wish to assert my 5th ammendment right. "

OJ had a cut on his hand. The bloody glove found did not have a cut to match. NOR DID THE GLOVE FIT.

OJ is not guilty in two ways: because of the police planted evidence, he did not get a free trial which is a RIGHT. There's too much doubt. Too many pieces of the puzzle missing.

You can't tell me the above stuff I stated doesn't make you wonder.

Scientology Helps Tom Cruise Avoid Vomit

Using the psycho-kenetic powers of Scientology, Tom Cruise was able to traverse the mean streets of New York and avoid vomit.

Rob Campaigns for Hillary

Hoping to relive his glory days as the hatchet man for Clinton, Inc., Rob, formerly known as Craig Livingstone, is actively campaigning for Mrs. Bill Clinton. He is eager to begin a whole new round of firings of the White House Travel Office and pulling the F.B.I. files of all Republican lawmakers and candidates. More on this as the story develops.

New Fashion Trend Sweeps Hollywood

A new fashion trend is sweeping Hollywood. Just as loveable Lil' Bow Wow Wow started the 1990's fashion trend of wearing clothes backwards, a famous, but unnamed, "Lawyer to the Stars" (representing such clientele as Ultraman) was spotted at a trendy SoCal office building wearing the latest in fashion: Two different shoes.

Sen. Obama is the New Clarence Thomas

The Democratic Party is at is again, although this time they have alligned themselves with Clinton, Inc. Just as the Democratic Party did in 1991 to Clarence Thomas, an African American who they decided "didn't know his place" and dared think for himself, they are now after Sen. Barack Obama. For racist Democratic politicians like Hillary Clinton and her breed, a black man in politics fine as long as he cow tows to their way of doing things. But if he dares think that he is entitled to run for president and challenge the Democratic Party's annointed one, he will be given the Clarence Thomas treatment.

As Justice Thomas famously declared, "This is not an opportunity to talk about difficult matters privately or in a closed environment. This is a circus. It's a national disgrace. And from my standpoint, as a black American, it is a high-tech lynching for uppity blacks who in any way deign to think for themselves, to do for themselves, to have different ideas, and it is a message that unless you kowtow to an old order, this is what will happen to you. You will be lynched, destroyed, caricatured by a committee of the U.S. Senate rather than hung from a tree."

That's why Clinton, Inc. and its surrogates have characterized Sen. Obama as a drug dealing terrorist who can't be elected because he is black.

The poverty pimps like Jackson and Sharpton can't allow him to be the nominee, or worse, elected, because it will undermine the lie of their very existence: That America is a racist country who still needs the likes of Jackson and Sharpton to advance the cause of African Americans.

On November 4, 1994, the liberal talking head Julianne Malveaux said of Supreme Court Justice Thomas: "I hope his wife feeds him lots of eggs and butter and he dies early like many black men do, of heart disease....He is an absolutely reprehensible person."

I guess we will hear a similar lament if Sen. Obama wins the nomination.

Sexiest Woman Alive

Correction

In a recent posting, I expressed my horror over human urine being thrown at Dallas Cowboy quarterback Romo during yesterday's football competition. That report was wrong. It stems from the announcer's pronounciation of a New York Giants player's last name, Umenyiora, which sounds an aweful lot like "human urine" so that was the basis for the error. I deeply apologize.

SHAME ON GIANTS' FANS

Last night I watched the Giants v. Cowboys football game in HORROR as the TV announcers told the television audience that "Human urine is all over Romo!" They made the announcement twice during the game. Obviously some jerk in the stands threw a piss bomb on the Cowboy's quarterback. A "piss bomb" for those of you outside of southern California is when a soccor fan urinates into a zip-lock bag and throws it into the crowd seated below him. Evidently, this is now happening in the NFL and is being directed toward players. This must stop.

My New Year's Resolution

This is the year I’m finally going to tack on those extra 25 pounds. I’ve been skinny since birth (8 lbs. 6 oz.) and every year I tell myself that this is going to be my big year for bulking up. Well guess what, body? THIS IS THE YEAR. I’m going to get so fat.

I better not become one of those dudes who gets a fat belly and nothing else. I hate those jerks. From behind, they look like normal guys, but as soon as they turn around – wham! – How did that guy get pregnant? Skinny legs and a fat belly is no way to go through life, that’s for sure. When I get fat, I want to be fat EVERYWHERE. I want people to look at me and think “doughy.” I want people to hide under their desks in fear of an earthquake every time I take a step. I want to get so fat that I don’t even get fat-rolls when I sit down, I just get a blob.

In order to gain the most weight possible, I’ve set up a very strict regimen for myself. I’m going to park as close to places as possible so I don’t have to walk. If there aren’t any spaces available, I’ll just wait in my car and eat a candy bar until somebody comes out. When I go to the grocery store, I’m going to get one of those electric carts to zoom around in so I’m not burning calories as I’m buying calories. I will never take the stairs. As for eating, I’m going for quantity over quality. Do I want cheese on my fries? Yes. Do I want to super-size something? Of course.

By summertime, there’s going to be a whole new me walking around this place and I'll be breaking every chair I sit in. Say goodbye to the skinny old guy you once knew, because here comes Big Bill and I’m going to eat your lunch.

Wish me luck.

Congratulations, Lou Gosset Jr.!!!

A Big High Five goes out to Lou Gosset Jr., for getting voted into the Hall of Fame for Baseball. And without Steroids!

A Time for Political Realism

During the GOP debate the other night, America's Mayor Rudy Giuliani quoted the Great Communicator Ronald Reagan, as saying "if someone agrees with me 70% of the time, that doesn't make him my enemy." That made me reconsider my criticism of RINOs (Republican In Name Only). True Blue Conservatives use the term to attack GOP moderates. Mike Huckabee and John McCain have been attacked as RINOs. The Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger also has been called a RINO. Before him was the original, and self-proclaimed RINO -- Mayor Richard Riordan. Those of us who attack RINO’s, however, must confront the question: Would we really prefer that such people drop the Republican monicker? How does it help the conservative cause if politicians leave the GOP and go independent or worse -- join the opposition? When Jim "Benedict Arnold" Jeffords left the GOP and joined the Democrats, he gave them control of the US Senate. When Lincoln "Judas" Chafee lost his Senate seat in 2006 because of his RINOism, it also gave the Democrats control; if Chafee had won, the GOP would still have a Republican majority in the Senate. Imagine getting a Justice Alito or Justice Roberts through the Democratic controlled Senate today! The reality is that no successful political party has ever been built on ideological purity. You construct a majority coalition by bringing people into your party -- not by driving them away. It is destructive to the conservative cause to go after RINOs. Democrats generally understand this principle and with the exception of Senator Joe Lieberman, they never attacked DINOs (Democrats In Name Only) but actually tolerated the Boll Weavels/Southern Democrats/Reagan Democrats. In fact, during the last election cycle, they put forward several conservative Democrats in key Congressional districts, which helped them win a majority in he House and Senate. If Republicans continue to knee-cap RINOs, the GOP will not regain the majority in the Congress and the GOP will never win California in a presidential race. It's great to be a purist, but you will be as effective as a Preying Mantis' Motion to Quash.

The Evidence is in . . . .

While purporting to take time off to be with his family, Andrew was reported to have been seen out and about town in shorts. This recently unconvered photo establishes this rumor as FACT.

The Verdict is in . . .

It seems that we have our very own Lindsey Lohan working amongst us. Who is this guilty party? He claims he was just "resting his eyes" with his head leaning against his hands in a parked car. He further claims that he was also using his Blackberry at the time. I contacted building management, and it seems that they caught the whole thing on video. After a little cajoling, they produced it for me. I report. You decide:

Hillary is No Ed Muskie

After suffering a humiliating third-place finish in Iowa, and facing a banner headline from Drudge Report Monday morning stating she sould drop out if she lost big in New Hampshire, Democratic presidential candidate Mrs. Bill Clinton choked up with tears when a New Hampshire voter asked her Monday "how she does it." We know she plants these questions, but come on, that was even a softball for Team Hillary.

She sobbed in response, "I have so many opportunities in this country, I just don’t want to see us fall backwards. This is very personal for me," Mrs. Bill Clinton told a group of nearly 15 women at the Cafe Espresso in Portsmouth. You bet it's personal. Mrs. Bill Clinton is running for president as a way to vindicate her own sense of self-worth and to feed her enormous ego. She is driven by no principle other than power.

Mrs. Bill Clinton also made some comparisons to her main rival Barack Obama, who beat her and John Edwards in the Hawkeye Cauc-eye State and maintains a substantial lead over both of them in New Hampshire polls when she wept on, "You know some of us put ourselves out there and do this against some pretty difficult odds and we do each one of use because we care about our country and some of us are right and some of us are wrong. Some of us are ready and some of us are not. Some of us know what we will do on day one and some of us really haven’t thought that through enough . . . So, as tired as I am and I am and as difficult as it is to keep up, what I try to do on the road is occasionally try to exercise and try to eat right. It’s tough when the easiest food is pizza." Wow. What a trooper. It's inspiring, it really is. Not.

If she's this tired this early, and cries like she's just watched a Lifetime Network Special Marathon because she has to eat pizza instead of cavier and because she lost a caucus, and falls behind in the poll, imagine what she would be like if she were facing the trials and tribulations of the presidency with President George W. Bush's approval ratings.

In 1972, Democrat Ed Muskie’s presidential campaign was derailed when he tearfully defended his wife from attacks on her personal character. Some are now asking, "Could this be Mrs. Bill Clinton's Edmund Muskie moment?"

Sadly, the answer is no. Under the topsy-turvey rules of the Drive By Liberal News Media, because she is genetically a woman, and women are expected to cry, she will get a pass.

Iowa Caucus Analysis

OK, after several humorous posts, I have decided to get serious in my blogging. Let's start with Iowa.

Predictably enough, most media commentators have totally misinterpreted the nature of Mike Huckabee’s big win in the Iowa GOP caucuses. Conventional wisdom says that he swept to victory based on overwhelming support from Evangelicals, but conventional wisdom is flat-out wrong. According to the exit polls used by major news networks, a majority of voters who described themselves as “evangelical” or “born again” Christians actually voted against Huckabee –with 54% splitting their support among Romney, McCain, Thompson and Ron Paul. Yes, Huckabee’s 46% of Evangelicals was a strong showing, but it was directly comparable to his commanding 40% of women, or 40% of all voters under the age of 30, or 41% of those earning less than $30,000 a year. His powerful appeal to females, the young and the poor make him a different kind of Republican, who connects with voting blocs the GOP needs to win back. He’s hardly the one-dimensional religious candidate of media caricature.

It’s also idiotic and dishonest for observers to keep harping on anti-Mormon bigotry as the basis for Mitt Romney’s disappointing showing. Yeah, it's true that 81% of Evangelicals voted against Romney--- but 75% of ALL Iowa Republicans voted against him, so where is the big evidence of "anti-Mormon bigotry"? In other words, there’s only a 6% difference between his general rejection and his Evangelical rejection. There’s no evidence, in other words, that those who described themselves as “born again” or “evangelical” faced an especially tough time voting for a Mormon. Romney, after all, finished second among this group—as he finished second among the electorate in general. Among Evangelicals, Mormon Mitt beat John McCain, Fred Thompson and Ron Paul by a ratio of nearly two-to-one…a bigger, not smaller margin of victory over these other non-Mormon candidates than he managed to achieve in the electorate in general. The message ought to be obvious: the core issue was phoniness, not faith-- and the religious and non-religious alike react badly to phoniness.

Meanwhile, 87% of non-Evangelicals voted against Huckabee.... compared to only 66% of all Iowa Republicans.... in other words a 21% gap! Think about this.... THERE'S MORE EVIDENCE IN THE EXIT POLLS OF ANTI-EVANGELICAL PREJUDICE than there is of anti-Mormon prejudice. Huckabee did well across the board with all groups in the exit polls except one: the 40% who said "no" to the question, "Are you a 'born-again' or 'evangelical' Christian?" He finished fourth among this group, behind Romney, Thompson and McCain.

The evidence is pretty clear, isn't it? The preferences of Evangelicals mirrored those of Iowans in general. But the preferences of the "non Evangelical" group were distorted by their religious beliefs (or non-beliefs) and led them (as the same prejudices leads angry members of the conservative establishment) to blast, resent and dismiss the Huck.

Massaging the numbers another way ---Huckabee got 46% of the Evangelical vote, only 14% of non-Evangelical--- a huge 32% difference based on the rejection by these people of a well-known religious identity.

Romney, on the other hand, got 19% of Evangelical vote, and 33% of non Evangelical voters--- a vastly less significant 14% difference...

In other words, Non-Evangelicals appear to have been much more influenced by the religious variable in their distaste for Huck, than Evangelicals were influenced by that variable in their distaste for Mitt.

Those who insist, over and over again, that the Iowa Caucuses reflected “Christian identity politics” or a “tidal wave of Evangelical support” are basing their analysis on feelings, not facts; on vapors, not voters. It’s dishonest to say that a guy who just won a crushing state-wide victory, without even winning the majority of his own religious group, displayed a one dimension appeal to Christian zealots only.

This endlessly repeated story line is not only tired, it’s a lie.

WANTED -- DEAD OR ALIVE!!

This message goes out to the animal who continuously and repeatedly and shamelessly fouls the men's room commode. No one wants to see your mess, so flush it! You do not need to use half a dozen toilet seat covers, and you do not need to go throuh a roll of paper laying down a protective layer between your butt and the toilet seat -- your ass ain't that precious. If I EVER find out who you are, I will use your head as a toilet brush. I know someone in law enforcement and will use a police profiler to find out who you are. I am also creating a list of SUSPECTS. You better hope I don't find out who you are.

Motion to Quash

I will not be ignored by a waiter!